All bicyclists have their horror stories of negative encounters with motorists. I had a pistol pointed at me by a pick-up truck driver who took umbrage at another rider's one-finger salute for passing too closely. This was in rural Arizona.
However, let me offer a counter-story, to all this fear and loathing. I do an 18 mile ride through town nearly every weekday morning. During the trip, I exchange good mornings and smiles with at least a half dozen people who are walking dogs, getting the paper, running, power walking, getting into their cars, working as crossing guards, or "yard men." Never once has anyone suggested that I get off the road, use the sidewalk or another street. No one has thrown anything at me. Occasionally a carload of teenagers might scream out the window as they drive by. I just wave back, wishing I was 16 again. I have ridden 3500 miles per year on the streets of Tallahassee for the last five years, mostly during peak traffic periods with very few unpleasantries.
A few weeks ago, while pedaling up a hill on Sharon Drive which parallels Tharpe St., I noticed an empty beer bottle on the road. A middle-aged fellow was walking toward me. We intersected at the beer bottle. "Thought I'd pick that up before it becomes a thousand flat tires," I said, smilingly.
"Here let me take it," he said, stooping for the bud bottle. "You know, I see you riding all the time. Every time I see you, it makes me happy. I'd be running today if it weren't for my bad knee. More people should ride bikes."
Needless to say, that encounter made my day. With more gusto than usual, I said, "Good Morning!" to the next person, a senior citizen getting her paper, and was rewarded with a bigger smile than usual.
Here is my advice: strive to harmonize, not antagonize. Smile a lot. Signal a lot. Be patient. Stop at all traffic lights and signs as the most law-abiding car would do. Make eye contact. Try not to compete for space with the motorists if possible. Try not to delay the motorists who are in a perpetual hurry. Be assertive, but not aggressive. Relax. Avoid high speed, high traffic, narrow roads without shoulders or bike lanes. Be visible from the space shuttle. I have added an orange safety flag to my urban rig and notice wider motorist passing margins and more deference.
And yes, gasp! heresy! take the occasional sidewalk as a last resort. Survival over dogma.