Remember when you're on that next ride that the person leading is a human being too. Consider that they don't get paid, that they have taken special pains to plan the ride before the fact, and that they have feelings just like you. Out of the goodness of their heart flows the seamless ride that takes you from here to there and back again. Their only reward is the pleasure of the ride and your pleasant company. In view of these facts consider your own behavior and try to be gracious.
There are no absolute rules that govern the behavior of ride leaders. They make their own rules, sometimes as they go along, as necessity dictates. Sometimes they find they have to change the way they lead when the way that they have led proves to be ineffective. Sometimes ride leaders find that they have to make decisions about things that they would rather not even think about. Sometimes a ride leader has to tell a ride member that they are no longer welcome to ride with the group.
If you ride with a particular ride leader and you don't like his style or the way she conducts the ride, you don't think that they push discipline or safety enough, or you think they make petty demands from the group in regard to safety or protocol, you have choices. One of those choices though, is not to complain to the President. I do not second guess ride leaders. I don't train ride leaders, nor do I tell them how to ride or where to ride. I don't define who can ride, what speed the ride takes place at, whether or not there will be pacelines or rest stops. I don't decide how long the rest stop will be, where it will be, how many can ride abreast, or what the average speed will be. I don't teach them to fix flat tires, don't require them to carry tools, don't demand they have cell phones or know CPR. I don't define the subject of the ride conversations nor specify whether the group must wait for people who need to fix a flat. These things are all up to the ride leaders themselves and their own proclivities. I can make suggestions, just like you can, as to what would be civil, but ultimately it is all up to the ride leader, because they assume responsibility for the ride and its outcome. If you don't like a ride leader's style then you need to find another ride leader and group whose style better suits your own. Whining won't change a thing, diplomacy might. If you wonder about a ride leader's style and requirements, ask them up front.
As a ride leader myself I have a great appreciation for how people on a ride sometimes take the leader for granted. Sometimes I have had people who acted as though I was the over-paid tour guide on their expensive vacation.
Often people have the expectation that I will fix their flat for them. Wrong! I'll wait for them to fix it and even lead them through it, but I won't do it for them. Some ride leaders will, but that's up to the ride leader. I expect some self-reliance.
Some ride leaders don't require a helmet from riders. Wrong! No helmet, they aren't riding with me. I won't share any guilt for their busted head. I expect people to have some regard for their own safety.
If someone rides in a reckless manner that demonstrates a disregard for the safety and the welfare of the other riders in the group and ignores my warnings to desist, I will take them aside and expel them from the group. I expect some consideration for others.
But that's just me. If you can't find a group leader that suits you, there is always the final option, lead a group yourself; then you can have it your way.
A sincere thank you to all of you GCC ride leaders, for shouldering the burden.
Following winds, my friends
Rob Wilt